The Sensuality Deception, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Mind

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and males use love to obtain sex." This is a excellent summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is comparable to the Love Trap, where songs translate good sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further because for these songs, having sex carries immense meaning and consequences.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they believe sex is a essential test of compatibility, (if the sex is good then the relationship will ready also).

B.more commonly, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, rather than taking a look at whether this other person may be a match on levels besides physical tourist attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, needs, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to keep in touch with reality when all those hormonal agents are running wild. Our body responds to somebody we are drawn in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), that makes the chance to make love with someone we are drawn in to exceptionally hard to resist. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce feelings), that makes us feel really near to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are strong and uncontrolled , leading to effective sensations of destination, enjoyment, love, well-being, and closeness .

But when issues emerge, those who fall into the Sex Trap often rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is excellent!" They more than likely would not confess it, but they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that a lot of his customers have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay males especially in metropolitan areas, sex is readily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North states. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really click to read going to be great?".

Nevertheless, North adds, "I suspect this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is necessary. Yet, chemistry is a considered that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry occur, though in some cases it can grow in time.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and truth hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you should balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This indicates combining chemistry with common sense. While good sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner options by paying complete focus on your vision, goals, values, and requirements -- while feeling all those amazing sparks!

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